Don’t Explain

by Scott Noelle

Being on the leading edge of parenting, you may find yourself explaining to others why you parent the way you do.

This can be a good thing when someone has expressed curiosity about it and you’re simply sharing information. But it’s better not to explain yourself if you’re trying to justify your choices.

Justifying gives away your power. It implies that you need the other person’s approval. It undermines your self-confidence and distances you from your Inner Guidance.

The “need” to explain and justify your choices is based on the “need” to be right. But if your parenting choices are “right,” and the other person would parent differently, then s/he must be “wrong.” Once you get in that right/wrong mode, conflict or interpersonal tension is inevitable.

Instead of explaining your parenting to others, silently remind yourself that your choices are right for you, and your own approval is all you need.

Originally published on 2006-08-23
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